I had a nice chat with GG the other day on MSN. I have known GG for more than 10 years. I knew her in the third year of my working life while in Singapore. She was one of the Realtors in the company, always bringing clients around for flats viewing. She was friendly, willing to share opinion and open. I like her because she didn't take herself too seriously and even laugh at herself, down to earth and genuine. GG is one of the very few friends I have known for more than 10 years. She felt exactly the same as more than 10 years back. Time has not changed her. We still talk about the up and down of the property markets and the effects of the economy.
As one aged with time, one becomes better at living with oneself. Probably you may have friends that already settled down with a family, but for you, you just "settled down with yourselves" if you don't have a young family. You also grow more likely to revise expectations about friendship as time gone by, as you become more open-minded and generous and also learn to take things easily. However, it could be harder. If you were younger, as you would tend to be tenderer and vulnerable, not having that friendship that potentially could be "further developed" (whatever that means to you) could be quite hurtful. It takes times for you to realize some friendships just cannot be forced. Some pains just need to let itself out slowly and being angry over it only aggravates matters. As I could remember, those experiences I had only challenge me to build up my composure and made me into a stronger person over time. One just needs to be very patient with oneself and remember to focus on what one have, and not what one doesn't have.
I have different expectation about friendship nowadays, and I treasure this one with GG. There is noting heavy in it. It's amazing how people can attract people, sometimes it could be so simple that you can't believe it is happening. GG is such good fun. She is not one of those friends that if I didn't visit them when I am back in Singapore, they will take it to heart, though I know some will and make me feel guilty for a long time. GG and I chat on line only about 2 or 3 times a year. I met her maybe one every year or once every two years. She is one of those friends that, when we made jokes and laughed, I can laugh out loud until I cry, it gave me lots of belly pains, but it certainly worth it! We are happy the way it is with no further expectation of each other. Friendship, at this stage of my life, is nothing more than a good company and that matters to me. GG, you are everything that money can't buy! :D
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