When "being focused" is taken to the extreme...

".... you forget to return to the real world."

I finished watching "Perfume: The Story of a Murderer" from the BBC Iplayer tonight. This is not a new movie. It was shown in 2006. It's a different sort of Thriller movie, as you would expect with blood, murder and dead bodies. However, I like the story telling. It is stylish and it also subtly touched on the human side. I cannot help but develop empathy for the movie's main character, Jean-Baptiste Grenouille played by Ben Whishaw. because of his rough upbringing and how he survived in tough situations. He has a gifted sense of smell, which in the end motivated him to invent the most uniquely formatted perfume, and even to the extent of extracting and formatting perfume from unique human body odour, which means he needs to possess the whole body and how it leads to him going a step further.

It is rarely that movie relate human killing in this way. It is stylish because like all movies on human killing, which treats murder as a mean to an end, this movie shows the character's need for a unique smell, something that viewers can relate to. It is not like you kill human body part because you like to torture or you enjoy bloody gore. In a way, while the killing is brutal, the story telling was good. It is just a classic case of "being focused" is taken to the extreme, which develop quite naturally following the upbringing of this main character. You thought of him being nearly abandoned by his mother as soon as he was borne, and how he sold from one trader to another as slave, you almost forget this boy needs to find something he can identify or belong to. In fact, he has nothing, not even the slightest sense of freedom. That gift of smell in him saves him. He went after that, chased after it at all costs to pursue it. You just feel heartbroken at the look of Ben Whishaw in his portray of the character, showing much of the vulnerability and innocence, feeling all sorry for his destiny.

Dustin Hoffman who played the washed up perfumer, Giuseppe Baldini and who bought Ben Whishaw over from his master, taught the latter technique on perfume making. He told Ben Whishaw, "Talent is next to nothing, while experience, acquired in humanity and hard work, means everything". However, the obsession of the gifted sense of smell in Ben Whishaw drives him to the extreme to pursue further in finding the unique odour. As brutal and cruel as he may seem, he has tears in his eyes, when he realized how he accidentally put a young woman to death all because he wanted to possess her because of her odour. Unfortunately, his obsession has taken him so far that he just could not bring himself to love and be loved like most could. I just wonder how many of us are just the way like this, never mind if you are a murderer, as long as you let your secret obsession took over and when it went a little one step too far.

I give up fighting altogether!

"What an idea, giving up? what a disgrace! But it's a quite BIG thing to do, i.e., giving up. The underlying of giving up fighting is to simply, follow the flow"

Today I followed the flow in my ipod. ipod is an interesting invention. Firstly, the lazy technology simply resort to shuttling your songs as a mean of saying "it gives you different experience" as every time you shuttle your songs you gained different experience. The truth is, there is no technology on ipod to incorporate a choice option to pick songs, perhaps the later ipod, but not the earliest ipod, which is the one I used at the moment.

Thanks to the shuttle option, it allows me to "follow the flow". I normally walked to my office with my ipod shuttle on, and each time I had an expectation of the next song that is going to be played out and if it turned not the song I was expecting, I "fight" it by clicking on to the next song. People have the habit of loving things new and latest, so is my choice of songs, the latest the better, even you may put all new and old songs as BIG mix in the ipod shuttle.

This sort of "follow the flow" helped you build up "quality time" for that 20 minutes way to the office. Let the songs play and let the feeling associated with the song come naturally, remembering what the songs meant to you, and enjoy that unique moment of connection, it makes that beginning of the day a whole new experience.

The Secret of Breathing

 "... is for you to find out.."

This is correct. It sounds a bit silly, yes it's the commonsense way of breathing I am referring here. Let it take over. Well, don't we all breath, if not we would have all gone dead by now. Yes and that is also correct, but the secret of breathing is for you to find out. It's meditation I am talking about.

I attended a Buddhism talk recently. The speaker spoke about meditation and we had some simple practice in the session. I often felt I never really know about meditation as it is so "mysterious". The state of mind someone is in and the effect it has on the person continue to make me interested to want to know more. I then realize meditation is just a state of mind that you practice "awareness". It all begins with the breathing and the awareness of how it starts and how it ends, which over and over again it repeats. In the process of observing and aware of the whole process, your mind might run wild but, as the speaker in the Buddhism says, just remember to get back to the present, i.e., where you are, how you feel and how you breath too. All in all, it brings back your focus.

I have been trying this a few times, with some music on the background to make it interesting. The end effect for me is that, you find your breath becomes smoother after that, and more relaxed. You do regained certain degree of focus back. So, if before the meditation, if you have a few things in mind you wanted to do, but cannot make up your mind, then after the meditation, you could feel more sorted and easier to help yourselves get on with things. Yes you feel more "settled", your mind less "crowded", which is good because you just feel "all ready" for anything. At least before you sleep tonight, you are ready for the challenge tomorrow :D

"Happiness" is Cheap!

 "Yes and in fact, I just got one that cost me only 20 pence!"

Sunday is often a time that you feel "settled". It's a day you tend to do the washing, hoovering the flat, and get ready for the new week to come. So, Sunday's evening, after dinner time is the best time of the week. Normally, one of those "to do" list on my plate will be preparing for lecture, which I don't have to do this time as there is a 4-week Easter breaks ahead of me. Today is therefore relatively relaxed. I went for my swim as usual and then went to the public library and found a surprise book sales, all at 20 pence. I had a quick browse and found a book titled, "You can be Happy No Matter What" and I bought it.

This book is an easy-read. Perhaps it looks like another "self-help" book, but more importantly, I am interested to see what sort of "happiness" that this book is making out of. Honestly, who needs another self-help book when all that people talk about these days are "happiness" and "mindfulness". There's loads of similar stuff around and they keep on repeating.

I had a couple of other similar "self-help" book of this sort. They all central around the "happiness" issues. One of them talk about using the "mindfulness" technique, the other more creatively, taking the standpoint of "Time Management" to see how proper use of meaningful time can have "happiness" moment. When there are too many books written on the same issue, don't you think such "happiness" topic is becoming very cheap. Indeed, I just bought one that cost only 20 pence! Still, I guess it is interesting to read them and be aware of the style these authors adopt. Each of them see it from different angles, and similar ideas go round and round, each reinforces the other and when it reaches you, it just helped you gain a different perspective altogether and allow you to have your own conclusion about "happiness". If you know how to read a self-help book properly, you could end up gaining a lot more from them than most do! :D

Happiness comes when you "relax"....

".... and you can even nurture it and let it be part of your everyday life."

It's the new year 2011 and this means I have been in Loughborough for almost 18 months now. I am quite settled in to be honest, and somehow you got that feeling of "missing on something". This is quite normal at this time of your life. Your life gets on with a bit of "a holiday" of itself, all happened in its own way in your mind. Somethings just not there, it's just your imaginations. I seem to slowly become hyper-active, as if when things are settled and fine, there must be something there to disturb the equilibrium. At times, you wonder what they are. Strange enough, when you are in the office in the day time, when you stick to the routine at work, you get on with the flow and you enjoyed it, only when approaching end of the day, you got that feeling to "want to do a bit more", but feel that you can afford to relax and less of a workaholics you actually think there is nothing very much you can do in the evening!

I do agree sometimes I have difficulties relaxing myself. A couple of friends suggested I keep a pet, but I hate pets. The maintenance is tedious and time consuming. One other friend suggested me to read a novel, which is not a bad idea. So I should be thinking about this. Finally, one thing that we all must always be reminded of, well just simply be happy. It needs not have any reasons, just be happy.

I found a couples of sites that I would say is a rather creative way to nurture happiness. The BBC Happiness Challenge and the Guardian start happy walking mediation podcast. Perhaps this will give me a sense of the art of relaxation.