Visiting Singapore; Visiting people

"... but, who will I visit and how many will I visit"

I emailed a friend yesterday, telling him, how differently I felt each time I returned to Singapore. Indeed, I am suddenly a bit confused whether going back Singapore, as if a routine (just like some may think visiting relatives during the Chinese New Year), is this doing it for my parents (as they probably miss me) or doing it for me (taking time off, holidaying, etc) or perhaps a bit of both, but still not sure which is more. I find myself knowing lesser and lesser friends in Singapore, following my long stay and work in the UK, which is inevitable. Each time I went back Singapore, those who I SURELY want to meet, guess who? well, those who went to college/University with me, those friends I get along well in the past. So, hopefully something can be planned along those lines.

Sometimes, I thank facebook; some other times, I hated it. Facebook help bridged people who lost touch in the past, but also brought back nightmare, some old enemies, who you made during those immature years at school. Forget about "mending the relationship", something in life are just worth forgetting, right? I remember getting in touch with my secondary school mates once using a social media (i don't think is facebook), and we had a couple of gathering in a couple of years I went back Singapore. After that, I don't feel like attending and never attend anymore, just not sure what to chat about, also, I spent so many years in the UK, there is really no common talking point.

The social media change the way people perceived friendship. I always think there must be some gaps left behind. Human is complex enough. However, you do lost touch with your "self", and forget altogether what you want and doing things the majority are doing, which is not necessary. Interesting, I do find a couple of funny people during the University day that I like to get in touch back again. I am happy to find one such friend on facebook. I really look forward to meeting him in my trip back to Singapore.

I actually like meeting some of my aunties. Most of them adore me when I was little. I think I am really lucky here. I also like to meet a couple of  "distant" uncles. I like meeting them because they like to "chat" and downplay making meeting like a big thing, so normally will do with cup of tea, simple drink, etc, which I prefer. I guess this is a bit like a very Western thing, where you will say to a mate, "let's go for a pint, I buy you a drink and we can have a chat". We normally go to the "public house" (pub). In Singapore, we may go to the "coffee shop". However, "coffee shop" tends to be "greasy", but there are "posher" ones these days. On the other, pubs also have quieter one and nosy one, all up to your preference.

I had not made plans already to meet people this time back to Singapore. I guess I will meet the "usual suspects" and give some surprise phone calls to some on my lists that I had not contacted for ages. I guess I should not be too ambitious over the coming 3 weeks, also to take things easy. If not able to meet up with so and so, can also do next time. It is strange that some people still feel "offended" just because you didn't go and see them. I don't get it. Anyway, I can't spend too much time on them. I must think more for myself and have time for myself. There will be two hours left before my plane landed in Singapore tomorrow this time. I am looking forward to it, the journey more than the destination actually.

A time and place for everything

"When it feels right, you will enjoy it"

Following my exam finished today, I will be locking myself away from tomorrow onward for 5 or 6 days to mark those 175 exam scripts. This also marks the end of the second semester and the beginning of a three months "breaks". For the past few days, I had been busily attending to students' enquiries in the office, replying emails mostly and suddenly felt I have loads of time on hand. As the term comes to the end and my teaching finished, I seem to be left with "nothing much to do". The evening suddenly felt so "empty", watching "Britain Got Talents" for the past one week, though enjoying it, still find a little "missing out on something". It just didn't feel right to do anything, not even leisure reading, writing blogs or even getting out and about, going for a walk. It gets a little mechanical when what you do the following day was to go to office, seat yourselves down and then wait for students to come by and one by one, you "served" them. The evening felt like a time to "do something", but you get restless because you can't seem to find "things" to do. Perhaps that's what commonly known as boredom. I found that the worst of those moment, is to find myself forcing myself to become productive and start digging out research task to do, surely that is going to become counterproductive before too long. Of course, I didn't do that.

I remembered I had a little thought about "relaxation". Even to the extent that it has to be "focused" . Now, I think there is a time and place to do anything, especially when you are "relaxing". What to do, how to do it and when to do it, I think it matters. I listened to Jazz Musics first thing when I came home, as soon as my laptop is switched on. The music filled the air with a sound of yesteryear and a nicer feel comes along when it gets darker with only my lamp lighted up in my living room. The timing seems right and It's a nice feeling. It felt relaxed.

I guess I just have to "put my mind and soul" at that moment, and indulged myself in it. Yes, there are few things in life that you do "automatically" and adjust to it, as it is already built in somehow. For example, these days I became more and more "used to" my body mood to go swimming. I resist it lesser and lesser. So, when the time comes, I will just got up and go without hesitation. Now, i go three times a week, and whether the pool is crowded or not, I will get by it and get the most of each session of my swim. There is a time and place for everything. When it feels right, you will enjoy it, but you should really know what you enjoy most in the first place.